DENIAL

Denial seems to be the life-blood of addiction. It permeates all aspects of the problem and contradicts what is really happening, this perpetuating the illness.

By refusing to accept what is happening, the dependent drinker or addict does not have to face reality and can subconsciously deny the consequences. The guilt and shame can be so painful that the person will not talk about his drinking or they will deny it is causing any problems. In either case, he or she defends their dependence. The blame can lie elsewhere. That person is therefore absolved.

Dependent drinkers will conceal the amount they are drinking. They believe they do not drink more than "normal" people while in reality they
are drinking much more than the social norm.

People close to the dependents (the co-dependents) that deny what is happening are instinctively trying to protect themselves from pain and loss in their lives. Full of anxiety, they do everything they can to tidy things back into place, to make believe the situation is other than what it
actually is.

They minimize the value of what they have lost, refuse to accept the evidence of their emotions, deny their own feelings, and adopt a "don't
care" stance.

In times of great stress, those around addicts hut down their awareness of things that distress them too much, in order to be able to cope. This
can serve to protect the co-dependent until he or she acquires the resources to deal with their real feelings about what has happened. At that
point, for those facing reality, the experience can be devastating.

The pain felt at the loss of denial can be as difficult to bear as the grief felt at the loss of a loved one. At times like these, the co-dependent
should seek support from others who have faced similar trauma either through self-help groups or counseling. It is also advisable to seek God
for help, knowing that he is bigger than your addiction and can help you if you honesty seek him. Additionally one should seek professional help
by opening up to your family doctor or an alcohol addiction counseling service provider, such as THE HOUSE OF GRACE.

The addictive personality can certainly be harnessed to make a good recovery and such is the tenacity of that personality to pursue its ends,
that a recovering addict is a force to be reckoned with, hence the positive energy felt in meetings attended by recoveries - newcomers and old
hands alike.

It is of enormous help to many of us to know that an alcoholic and/or drug addicted are seen as a sick person needing to be well, not a bad
person needing to be good. In most self help associations alcoholics who bad things are treated as if it were an independent illness. But the truth
is, alcohol is a spirit which alters ones behavior and thoughts. This not only takes social behavior classes for awareness, but the help of GOD
because it is a spirit in liquid, pill, gas, or powder form.

The power of denial is such that outside the mode of recovery, most people do not want to acknowledge the problem. It is just too much to deal with. However, the power of one alcoholic to share and identify with another's experiences is what most helps people to discover that they are not alone.

Frequently Asked Questions about Alcoholism

Could I be an Alcoholic?

Only you know the answer to this. There is no medical test for alcoholism.

Ask yourself the following questions and answer them as honestly as you can;

1.Is drinking making your home life unhappy?

2.Does your drinking make you careless of your family's welfare?

3.Do you drink because you are shy with other people?

4.Is drinking affecting your reputation?

5.Do you drink to escape from worries or trouble?

6.Do you drink alone?

7.Have you lost time from work due to drinking?

8.Has your ambition decreased since drinking?

9.Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?

10.Is drinking jeopardizing your job or business?

11.Have you ever felt remorse after drinking?

12.Are you in financial difficulties as a result of your drinking?

13.Do you turn to or seek an inferior environment when drinking?

14.Do you crave a drink at a definite time each day?

15.Does drinking cause you to have difficulty sleeping?

16.Do you want a drink the next morning?

17.Do you drink to build self-confidence?

18.Have you had a complete loss of memory as a result of drinking?

19.Has your doctor ever treated you for drinking?

20. Were you ever been in a hospital or prison because of drinking?

If you have answered YES to any one of these questions, there is a definite warning that you may be alcoholic.

If you have answered yes to two or more, the chances are that you are an alcoholic.

Why do we say this? - Because the experience of hundreds of thousands of recovering alcoholics has taught us some basic truths about our
symptoms - and about ourselves.



At THE HOUSE OF GRACE MINISTRY OF COMPASSION HOMELESS SHELTER our program reviews the development a ten-week program which combines the basic provision of AA and on-site counseling services.